Bishop Argus’ Closing Statements at the Trial of Li Arvi

". . . And so, in summation, it may be seen most clearly by yourselves, the august body of apostolic successors to the most holy Prophet of the Celestial Sun (may his name resound through all the spheres of Creation), that the wretched creature which cowers before the light of its deeds revealed and the judgement of its peers in the faith it so falsely professed, has damned itself by its own words in many instances throughout the course of this trial.

"Firstly, the so-called ‘Brother’ Li Arvi did, after having been in the service of the deceased, our beloved Archbishop Geraltus (may the Pancreator receive him in mercy), for only a year, compose the exhibited examples of what we loosely refer to as ‘poetry,’ wherein he expressed his secret desire for carnal relation with the archbishop, and furthermore had the effrontery to defend these lascivious scribblings as an ‘allegory of love for the Pancreator.’ That the deceased was never known to respond to these unnatural advances is a matter of common record, and by this righteous and proper rejection do we establish the motive of the atrocity under examination on this day.

"Secondly, we have the accursed weapon of murder itself, seen here to be one revolving pistol of the thirty-second caliber, found by my own investigators among the personal effects of the accused. While this alone may be sufficient for the conviction not only of a common murder but of a blatant violation of the Inheritance of Universality as well, closer scrutiny in this case discloses a deeper degree of sacrilege: indeed, when presented with the evidence of his crime, the accused not only denied possessing the thing, but appeared genuinely ignorant of its workings and operation. This was our first clue as to his true nature, for it is known to all that only the demons which reside in the darkness of the Realms Infernal may grant capacities, knowledge or skills which the Antinomist may not normally possess, and then remove them when their purpose has been served.

"And may I remind the esteemed court, which may wish to deny that diabolism hath ever touched the soil of Holy Terra, of the three bodies found drifting down the Missippi River this very morn, clothed in Decados livery and having upon them the paraphernalia of Antinomian practice.

"Thirdly, we have the mute testimony of the deceased himself, wherein are revealed many aspectsof thaumaturgical abomination. If Sister Claudia will display the chirurgeon’s diagram upon the lantern-screen, I shall explain. Let the record show that not less than seven projectiles passed through the archbishop’s cranial cavity in a span of no more than two seconds, in defiance of natural law which dictates that no more than three shots may be fired from such a weapon in that amount of time. The unnatural acceleration of time, that Universal Constant, necessary to accomplish this feat, is known to be a power conferred by thaumaturgic traffic with demons or relatively low rank. In addition it will be seen that the aforementioned weapon holds only six shots in its cylinder, showing us that an Antinomian perversion of the Rite of Fruitful Multiplication (as so often beneficently employed by our esteemed and beloved siblings of the Sanctuary Aeon) was here used. Furthermore, let us note that of these seven shots, two appeared to be of the thirty-eighth caliber and entered from the southeast, two of the fortieth caliber entered from the northeast, and three of the tenth millimeter entered from the south-southwest. Here the sheer enormity of the accused’s blasphemy threatens to overwhelm us as we not only recall that the rite of transformation required to change the size of these bullets is practiced only by such heretical sects as the Eskatonics, but also that the warping of space necessary to place these shots in this manner can be accomplished only by artifacts of the Preadamite jumpgate-builders (the acquisition of which is most unlawful), or by demons of the middle ranking. In light of all this, it is almost superfluous to note that the position of the accused in the Library Tower, which affords an adequate overview of the shrine’s plaza, greatly exceeds the twenty-meter effective range which the Pancreator in his infinite mercy accords such devices.

"Finally, as if any other damning testimony were necessary, we have the account of Li Arvi’s own family, each of whom repeated under oath that the accused did, upon the evening of this heinous crime, appear in their own home and eat of their repast with them as if nothing of enormity were occurring on the other side of the world at that very moment. I need not remind the court that the violation of natural law known as bilocation can be conferred only by the greatest of the Infernal powers.

"And so it remains only for the court to pronounce judgement upon this most deceitful and malicious specimen . . ."

[From Priests of the Celestial Sun, p. 90]